It is unfortunately quite impossible to give an exact science and timeframe of moving on, because every single person, breakup circumstance and relationship is totally different, and the time it takes will be unique to you.

That being said, if you are intentional with how you spend your time, I believe that you can start to feel a lot better within 3-6 months. 

I know how it feels to fear there’s nobody else out there for you, that there’s nobody out there like your ex, that it’s too late or that everybody is taken. When you’re feeling low and uncertain, optimism about your future can become non existent. This stress and worry can exist at the same time as not wanting anybody apart from your ex, and that is a strange but very real concept where two opposites in your mind are happening alongside one another!

Letting go after a breakup you didn’t want is incredibly difficult because it’s not just about losing the person -it’s about losing the future you envisioned with them. You grieve the lovely memories, the routines, the inside jokes, the smile you got when you saw their name on your phone, and the excitement of seeing them. Even if deep down you know the ending of this relationship is for the best, your ex represented certainty in your life.

After a breakup, the fear of never finding anyone else can be really overwhelming. And to be honest quite confusing, because you are grieving one person, and worrying you might not meet another. So what are the signs you’re ready to date after a breakup? I’m sharing 4 things in this article that really helped me to decide I was ready to get on a dating app.

Letting go of your ex when you still love them, or don’t want to let go of is a terrifying and helpless experience. When your ex chose the breakup and you know deep down you need to let go, it can be hard to know how to actually do it because it feels impossible and like you’ll never get there. It can also feel hard because you don’t actually want to let go, and it feels like the only solution to taking your pain away is getting back together. But the thing is, if this is what they want, it is so important to respect their decision, and put your attention on to you - handling it in the kindest, most patient way that you can with yourself.

When you didn’t want a breakup, this weird thing can happen where you suddenly feel like your value is defined by your ex; your ex didn’t choose you any more so now you must be any good, they look happy on social media so you’re going to be sad forever etc. It’s so scary and feels so real but is so untrue. When you stop seeing yourself through the lens of your ex you begin to see yourself clearly again. Making their life irrelevant though disconnecting is in my opinion an essential step in rediscovering who you are outside of the relationship.